Progression

Yes, I know it's late, but my day is just winding down.

Sometimes I forget how recently I started working. It's been a little over three months, but feels like longer (I guess settling into a routine has that effect).

Yesterday, I re-visited a project file that I'd worked on during my first month, and it looked...pretty shitty. Disorganized, incomplete, lots of cross-outs and eraser smears: it looked like a kindergartener had put in a lot of effort.

I remember putting a ton of time into that particular project and being pretty proud of the result, but after doing the same process a dozen or so more times, I've raised my standards (as have my supervisors). It suddenly struck me how much progress I've made. I no longer have to refer to my 'passwords' document constantly or check my notes to figure out how to do certain tasks.

Feeling competent every now and then is nice. Until yesterday, I was so focused on all the things I still still have to learn/improve on, that I hadn't considered the things I've already learned. Now that I'm no longer brand-spanking-new around the office, I'm trying to shift away from the 'just stay afloat' mentality (try really hard, ask lots of questions, take lots of notes, and accept that despite your efforts, you will make mistakes) in favor of the 'impress the boss(es)' mentality (try really hard, ask some questions, and do quality work). So basically, I'm giving myself a little less slack. In return, I need to also metaphorically pat myself on the back every once in a while for my progress.