High Times

Does the title of this post have anything to do with the fact that I've spent the weekend basking in the sun and eating excessive quantities of seasonal fruit? (What type of person would I be to waste your precious brain-space with such an entry?). In short - no.

This morning, while on a hill-walk with my mom, we got on the subject of kids who'd peaked in high school. (High Times --High school....see what I'm getting at?)

Back in high school, I wasn't particularly happy ("but you were winter formal queen and captain of the song squad," mother chimed in. Yeah, I remember). I wasn't bullied or subject to any traumatic experiences, but I wasn't satisfied either. I knew some kids that loved high school. They were born for the sole purpose of going to high school and being awesome.

At the time, I was envious of these kids. That ended on graduation day, along with their awesomeness. Now they are looking back on their heyday with sadness, knowing that they peaked too soon.

"See, time puts everything into perspective," mother chimed in.

I agree. However, when you are in the midst of a shitty situation, you can't raise your hand and say, "excuse me 12th grade english teacher. Things aren't going well for me right now, so I'm going to retreat into an obscure cave and return in five years with a fresh perspective."

On a grand scale I think I'm lucky. High school wasn't great. College was better, but still had some rough spots. My life has gotten steadily more satisfying over the years (save for some minor fluctuations), which is preferable to a sharp peak in my high school years, followed by spending the remainder of my life coping with the shock of nobody knowing or caring that I was hot shit at age 17. (*I was going to put a graph here, but technical difficulties said otherwise*).

Being too satisfied with life(whether by popularity, wealth, looks, etc.) too young is comparable to growing up too wealthy as a kid. The higher up the ladder you start, the harder it is to move up, and the less you'll appreciate it when you do.

So appreciate your humble beginnings. Happy 4th.

Epilogue to the previous entry

I was making a chocolate-chunk banana pancake for dinner tonight, and the new spatula couldn't keep up. I had to use fork to flip the pancake.

Karma

Rejection Ethics

Synonyms - refusal, spurning, dismissal, elimination.

Getting rejected sucks. Having to reject someone else...well, it also sucks. It's easy to tell someone you're not interested (hell-fucking-no, or the like), but how do you do it nicely? And is it okay to lie to spare someone's feelings?

This past weekend, I realized that I was without a decent spatula. My mom had given me a 20% off coupon to Bed Bath & Beyond (beyond what? nobody knows), so I decided to put it to good use. As I was leaving the store with my purchase, some guy asked me "where's your stuff?"

"Right here," I said, waving the spatula.
"That's all?"
"Yes. I had a coupon."

End of conversation, or so I thought. About 5 minutes later, as I was walking to my car, a few blocksaway, I heard someone yelling behind me. It was the guy, and he was running after me.

"Look at this coupon!" he yell/panted triumphantly. On his receipt, someone had hand-written '20% off total purchase,' (apparently it was a manager).

"Wow," I said, in a tone that attempted to hide how un-impressed I was. He didn't know that I knew that you could use multiple '20% off any single-item coupons' in a single purchase. I guess I did a good job of feigning interest, because we proceeded to have an unnecessarily long conversation about coupons.

After the awkward coupon-related chatter ended, in which I assured him that my mom would send me more coupons and I really didn't need his, he interjected with "you're so beautiful. We should hang out. What's your number?"

Shit. Put on the spot, I gave it to him (mostly so I could go free and not have to reject him then and there). As I was walked away (quickly- I didn't want to be caught up with again), I brainstormed about how to reject him nicely. He seemed perfectly friendly, just not my type (probably in his early thirties, and wearing sweat pants with a denim button-up shirt). I decided the best plan was when he called, I'd tell him that I had a boyfriend, but was so startled by his running after me that I hadn't remembered to tell him.

I immediately felt guilty (the downside of being a jew) about my plan, because there were two major moral problems:
1) If I had a boyfriend, I'd be a horrible girlfriend to 'forget' and let guys hit on me.
2) It's not true, so I'm a liar.

When it comes to rejection, being mean or blunt is easy. Being nice is an art--an art which I have not perfected, which is why, when the guy called tonight, I didn't answer my phone. He left a voicemail. I probably won't ever listen to it or call him back. And he'll probably think I'm a bitch.

I honestly do feel guilty, but how much must I compromise myself to spare others feelings?

[The rare and elusive coupon that started it all.]

Week 2: Loud, followed by very quiet

Week 2 has come to a close (I don't work on Friday, so I'm referring to the work week).

The week started out tough--since I was switching to the 4-day schedule, Monday was my first 10-hour day. On top of that, I had to work an extra half hour (more on that later). Not going to lie, it was a long day. I ate lunch while working at my desk so I could take a nap in my car during my official lunch break. Tuesday was a little better.

Yesterday, the office held an open house for it's clients, so the staff was all sent home at 4. We were only given 1.5 hours excused time, so we had to make up any extra work missed on other days (and that's why I worked extra time on Monday). Today, there was a TON of leftover food from the party. From what I overheard, everyone at the party got super drunk. I heard the receptionist complaining how hungover she was. College lives on!

I really like my job. I like the work I do, I enjoy the people, and, for this week at least, work has been my only social interaction. Roommate 1 went home for the week (his PhD summer classes don't start until next week), and roommate 2's school year just ended (he's a teacher), so I've been completely alone (other than trips to the supermarket....and people inside the television). It's weird to spend 11 hours surrounded by people and things, and then come home to....silence and stillness. Come back roommates! Please?

iLived

I have officially survived my first week as a contributing member of society. Overall, it wasn't bad! As I have no problem with the people I work with or the work itself, my biggest survival issue at this point is getting run over by crazy LA drivers.

iWork

Okay, so maybe iWork is already a trademarked apple product, but whatever.

In case you couldn't tell from the title, I work! (Regular 8-hour days this week- then next week I switch to AWS (alternative work schedule)--four 10-hour days per week. NO FRIDAYS EVER!).

It's tiring, but I really like it. Most of the cube-people are not too much older than me (the older fat-cats get offices).

I'm on the SAG (Screen Actor's Guild) team, so I audit the pension plans of actors, stunt people, and dancers for movies, commercials, and TV. The work is challenging (there are 10 million steps to prepping an audit, and each confidential database has a different password), but interesting. I have access to a lot of confidential information....

(I don't how much more I'm legally allowed to say about what I'm working on, so I won't, just in case.)

Later.

Not Ideas About the Thing But the Thing Itself

Moving tomorrow, and starting work on Monday.

I've been thinking about my first post-college job for a long time, but now that it's four days away, I have absolutely no idea what to think. I'm trying not to have expectations. A historical trend analysis would show that my expectations are usually inaccurate.

So, for now, I'm keeping "the future" off a pedestal and going into the real world with a clean slate.